It is hard to put part of your heart on a plane to travel half way around the world.

To a place..

…Where you know lice lie await your child

… A place where up to 8 kids sleep in three bunk beds pushed together…. In smothering temperatures.

…lots of walking to and from school with very little food to fill their bellies.

…no parents to hug and kiss them every day.

…lost in a cruel cruel world…

However….. We loved her more than we knew possible for 6 very short yet long weeks.

She read part of the Old Testament and the entire New Testament. Many Christians can not say that.

She read the story book, “Good and Evil”.

She has a storyteller box that tells the story of Christ in Chin@se with her.

She has a 53 pounds suitcase.. Yes 53 pounds… Delta didn’t say a word. Praise The Lord and thank you Delta!!! Full of goodies… New jeans, a winter coat, snow boots, sparkly pencils, gifts for her teachers and director, sweaters, warm PJ’s and cooler PJ’s, socks and craft kits to share, oh and one special gift for her friend Abby who was left behind unable to be hosted this time due to lack of paperwork…

We have equipped her with all physical and hopefully some emotional protection until we meet again.

If you have never considered hosting… Or adopting or fostering. I recommend hosting..
It’s a short time. Best experience for my children at home to love on a child who needs it fiercely.

To quote Paul, our house sure seems empty and a lot less laughter with Gina gone.

So much to do to help the fatherless… Please consider this option.

Tonight I was reminded of a little girl who arrived terrified just 6 short weeks ago. As I lay her pajamas in the bathroom and turn on her shower water… I realize she can do it now. She didn’t know how when she arrived.

She always comes out of the shower with her hair dripping over her face.

Tonight was no different…

She does that and I comb it back and comb out the knots.

Who will comb it next? When will her next warm shower be?

I started crying as I realize this will be the last night I lay her pajamas out and turn on her shower water or comb her hair. .. Possibly forever or possibly just a short while.

My heart aches for what lies ahead of her in own country.

I beg you to pray for Gina and many others…

Freshly showered and hair combed.. Writing so earnestly in her beloved journal.

As most of you know… I had to get a new blog. I am very sad to leave my old blog at blogger. I knew the ins and outs of blogger. WordPress seems so advanced. I couldn’t even change from my iPhone to an Android because didn’t want to learn new technology.

So here we go..hopefully a blog will hit me in the middle of the night and I get my bloggy blog on again.

Today is one of those days….where I can not wait to be alone to write on my blog and cry away.

The question about pizza is the question I asked my social worker at our adoption agency. Is today a eat one slice of pizza or should I eat the whole pizza for lunch? I know my agency has to be so tired of me and my sarcasm! Ha

                                      {THE WHOLE PIZZA WAS THE ANSWER}

I have been gracefully waitng for Cade. I have been doing so much better for Cade than I did for Mia and Avah. Third times a charm..right?

I get lots of comments saying I am sorry you have been waiting so long. I will be honest..paperwork wise “I” have not been waiting so long. My agency made me wait until April to send my homestudy. However, over 400+ days sent I  met my son…I have grown to love and ache for him fiercley. It is a terribly lonely process. Old adoption friends are great and encouraging and I have bond with them that is undeniable. New adoption friends can be incredibly awesome and encouraging. However new adoption friends can also think you are crazy and nuts with your crazy stalking…and that is okay too. To each their own.

Some friends received the news this week, there child will not come home this year, some received the news of EP submission or approval, some received court dates. My heart aches for those who received bad news and my heart rejoices for those who received good news.

We received the news today that of the 5 families waiting for court approval and a court date, we were not one of them. Most likely Cade will still come home this year….but it was a blow to my waiting mama’s heart.

I know God has this perfectly planned out so much better than I do.
I had many friends point out the positive.

~We were not in the first batch so the judges will get a feel for traditional families before they see our large family adopting our son with Biliary Atresia Kasai only. Huge deal…God is preparing the judges hearts. I know it.

~Cade has only had a little over a year at AMSA, this will give more precious memories at a great facility, in a an awesome country with awesome caretakers.

If Cade comes home in the last three months of this year….at least I will make it through soccer season with my older two kids. Get a good start on our school year. “Nest” like a crazy waiting mama nests.

My fervent prayer is for my baby boy to be home before his 4th birthday in Janaury.