We can plan it. We can try and control it. We can ignore it. We can skirt around it.
But it will still happen. Mind blowingly..it will still happen.
I have said before that traveling to the City of Children in Baja, Mexico…changed my life. We always wanted more children….we could…then we couldn’t..then we could…then back to we couldn’t…We played with God in that area. To suit what we wanted….little did we know…our daughters were already born and waiting for us in another country. And yes born in my heart….just not my womb. NO difference.
I was trying to plan. I was trying to control. I was trying to ignore. I was trying to skirt around it. I am still learning…its a process. You just can’t.
However..now that we know…. what do we do? I have read many blogs lately….one about from this blogger The Holy Experience. And another from this mom Eight is Enough. People are hurting. Christians want to know what to do with these feelings once we have experienced them.
I am so wrong to want to turn away and forget the hurt.
To forget those orphans who want a mom or a dad.
Yes there are even orphans here in the US.
I heard a christian say to a friend the other day, “I am glad the government supports them so I don’t have too.” Ouch…
Do we really feel that way? Do We? Are we missing out on our own children? Are we missing out on blessings because we have turned our nose up to the poor? The deserted? The lonely? The orphaned? The widowed? Is that what being a christian is about?
When we get to heaven…and if God says to us…”Why should I let you into heaven? What will we say?”
I could say, “Well I adopted 2 cute little Korean girls.” He will laugh in my face!!! That is a hoot. We need to feel….give until it hurts….support….bear a cross for these hurting. He carried ours. HE DID IT!! Can we not even pray for the hurting..can we not give up something per month to support an orphan?
Because God’s will WILL prevail, it will…
One of my very best friends adopted an adorable little girl 6 weeks before we brought home our precious Avah. My dear friend, has a huge heart. A HUGE heart! Supports orphans all over….waited a long…long…dreadfully long time to bring her daughter home. From a country that is known for knowing their medical. She wasn’t expecting her to have any special needs when she came home. She kept telling me how she was in such ‘awe’ of me bringing Avah home with her needs and she wasn’t sure she could handle that. Hahah….so nothing to be in awe of…by the way.
She even advocated and found a family for a precious little girl with cleft palate because that was a lot of surgeries and she wasn’t prepared for that.
Then she found out her daughter who just came home…had some serious medical issues. SERIOUS. She has cancer all over her little precious body. She has a syndrome that went undiagnosed in her country. UNDIAGNOSED. This country over diagnoses almost everything. They missed it. Many doctors reviewed her file in the states…and because of the certain missing information…it went undiagnosed. They went out on a limb and said yes. If this precious little girl would have been diagnosed in her home country….she would have been taken off the adoption waiting list. REMOVED. This country doesn’t allow children with serious special needs be adopted. (yes I know ….CRAZY).
So many things happened….during the process….She wasn’t told from her daughter’s agency that she had surgery(unheard of). There were leaks….they said nothing. Results from 2010….were just discovered and delivered…like last week. All of these test results would have diagnosed her. The US doctors would have figured it out. They would have known….
How does this happen??? Time and time again….all these little missing pieces of information…missing every.single.time. So many oppurtunities and nothing that would have diagnosed her..came out.
My friend and her husband may not have said yes….God Knew.
God’s WILL will Prevail…Why were just certain test results missing? Misplaced? I don’t think so. Why? How could this happen? Why were we not told during process when we were told so many other things?
It happened because this little girl needed her parents. God knew their hearts more than they did. God knew they could handle this. God knew….God knows HIS plan is bigger for them than their plan for themselves. God knows what they can handle. God knew. God will provide.
Avah and her friend….have caused her mother and I to bond more than ever. More than words can describe. I haven’t even met her yet. But our daughters share more than a home country…a home at the same orphanage….their diseases….are almost exact opposites….Avah has inside tumors….her friend has outside tumors….I don’t want Avah’s to grow so large they will show on the outside. And Avah’s friends tumors needs to stay on the outside…topically and not grow on the inside.
God’s plan is sooo big. Don’t limit him. Don’t limit yourself. God’s will WILL prevail, regardless, of my attempts.
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” – Isaiah 6:8
So here I am, Send me.