A Good Reminder…

I was reminded this morning of a night only 10 1/2 months ago, that I did not blog about.

There were no pictures to remind me later of the pain of that night.

Adoption moms know this day as Family Day or Gotcha Day. The long awaited day we all long to have.

I never blogged or Facebooked what ‘really’ happened.

I didn’t want to hear I told you so. I didn’t want Mia’s foster parents to read about how hard of a time she was having.

I didn’t want my adoption agency to think I was doing something wrong.

What I have learned over the last 10 months, about this infamous day…is what we experienced is normal.

Very.very.painfully.normal.

Most of you have heard the story, of when I had take Mia from her foster mothers arms …a bond I didn’t wish to break, but had too. How nervous, I was and when I just randomly hugged her foster father?? What was I thinking? Hello…cultural no-no!!

And she screamed, until we got into the cab. She went from screaming to laughing hysterically at the crazy cab ride. She laughed for a couple of hours. Looking back on this I realize, that this was part of her grieving. Laughing and Crying are two closely related emotions. Remember these pictures…Gotcha Day Cab Ride.

That first night, she hated me, Kenny, the hotel..I mean despised that hotel…we walked around Seoul for hours and she finally calmed down. I think she calmed down while walking because she thought we were looking for her beloved Umma.

She cried herself to sleep on Kenny’s shoulder, as she was grieving/sobbing….I was in our bathroom,sobbing, praying and asking God…what had we just done. Because she HATED us.

 And then I will bring you up today, most of you know how perfectly adjusted Mia is. How attached she is to me! How much she loves her daddy!! How happy she is!! How smart she is!!! How snuggly huggy, kissable, adorable, loving Mia is.

I can explain our gotcha night pain to my heart as the pain of physical labor while delivering my biological children.

A pain you forget so quick.

So quick, we have been waiting for Avah now for 9 months. We expect to travel to get this sweet one next month. I am sure she will struggle and grieve but all a pain that must be endured to become a part of her family.

It’s normal. It’s expected. It’s healthy. It will happen. And I can’t wait.

To add this little bundle of joy….

To this picture…

4 thoughts on “A Good Reminder…

  1. Oh Wendi, What you described could have been my daughter! She cried at every door (opened or closed) for her Omma for eight hours. I think the first few days are so hard on these children but when they learn to trust you as mama the rewards are so great. God is good!

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